We are family February 19, 2008

 Another entry for the abnormal smorgasboard.

No. 2.
It’s a joyous occasion to be shared with all your family

Lizzie and I are, as she’s mentioned, out to at least most of our immediate families. And they’re not too happy about it. Her family knows about the ceremony, and she has a member coming. Everyone else… they don’t want to talk about it.

Me… Most of my family doesn’t even know about the ceremony. Well, I don’t think they do. Who knows. All the gay wedding books (yes, I’m sick and I research everything) say “invite your family, even if the thought of you makes them sick to their stomachs! You’ll regret it if you don’t at least tell them and you patch things up, yada yada yada.”

I mention this to one of my friends, and she told me, “Jade, honestly I don’t think your Mom is going to say to you in 10 years, ‘You didn’t invite me to your commitment ceremony!’”

I’m a chicken. I came out to my Mom last year. Then all sorts of unrelated other shit hit the fan. It was one of the worst times of my life. And I’ve had plenty of sucky things happen to me, believe me.

Since then, I’ve been in full survival mode. I figured she can’t be nasty to me if she doesn’t have ammo (read: any information about my life). So I don’t give her ammo.

She’s gotten nicer, I’ve loosened up, but things aren’t the same. She’s still disgusted. I’m still guarded. I try to remain thousands of miles away with my multiple tentacles or whatever it is that makes lezzies slimy to the touch.

All this to say… I am under no obligation to invite anyone I don’t want there. Nobody. This is one day to get something most straight couples take for granted: Some positive public acknowledgment of our union.

So yeah. The uncle who hit on you once you hit puberty? The cousin who’s always mooching? The great aunt who could never remember your name?

All of you: Just stay at home.